Purposes of Baby Toys—the good, the bad, and the ugly!

With the holiday season upon us, I’ve been slowly building the following list of reasons we give our babies toys…there are some very positive reasons, of course, but I’ve also been pondering the not-so-positive (but sadly true, if we’re honest) reasons as well…

1. To help teach baby developmental skills that common household objects might not teach as safely or efficiently.
2. To entertain/distract baby when mom or dad need a momentary break from the job of full-time most interesting person in the universe.
3. To babysit baby—i.e. replace mom and dad.
4. To calm when baby is bored, over-stimulated, tired, or upset.
5. To give baby something safe to “put in the mouth” (for sucking, chewing, etc).
6. To provide safe tactile stimulation for baby’s growing senses.
7. To safely encourage baby’s boundless curiosity and exploration.
8. To expand baby’s horizons—through music, bright colors, manipulation, etc.
9. To help baby play pretend—either practice/ role-play adult activities (like cooking, eating, building, etc.), imagination-stirring toys (like unicorns and dragons), or experience aspects of the world not otherwise available to baby (like foreign cultures or being a horse trainer).
10. To sell merchandise associated with popular movies or TV shows.
11. To acculturate baby into gender-specific societal norms—like dolls and purses are for girls, trucks and transformers are for boys.
12. To subliminally teach/reinforce our own values and beliefs upon our children (ie: what we think is beautiful, right, appropriate, desirable, worthy, etc.)
13. To grow up good little consumers, who think that the more the better, and who always want something NEW.
14. To make mommy and daddy feel less guilty for not spending the time with baby that baby needs...
15. To reward or celebrate a milestone or special occasion with baby.
16. To satisfy our own need/desire to spend money (all the while justifying our poor choices because "it's for baby") by buying far too much for baby!

I hope this list gives you pause as it gave me—please email me with any other purposes that I might have missed!!

Instinctual Parenting...

Listen to your child.
Listen to yourself.
Stop listening to the advice of every "expert" (or "well-wisher") who comes along (including me).
Follow your instincts...you know your baby better than anyone else. (Nine months better, in fact.)
Trust what your child tells you.
Trust what your gut tells you.
Your baby chose you to be mommy and daddy for a reason...

Help your child be an Underground Baby!

There is so much information out there about how to raise your baby...so many "experts" and "well-wishers" telling you what to do and what NOT to do...much of this "add-vice" conflicts with itself, or even worse just doesn't seem to work for you no matter how much you try to make it fit.

It's easy for a parent to become stressed-out and confused with all the choices: Am I "ruining" my baby by nursing her to sleep, or should I let her occasionally cry herself to sleep? Will my baby catch every chance illness if I stop breast feeding, or should I breast feed until he's three? Which diaper should I choose with all the options and all the dissenting opinions--if I choose disposable, will I be adding to our land fill problem and further polluting the planet, yet if I choose cloth am I wasting our planet's most precious resource--water?

Let's stop "shoulding" ourselves to death!

I'm starting an UNDERGROUND movement; an underground movement for our BABIES; an UNDERGROUND BABY movement. A movement to educate ourselves, but choose without guilt or self-recrimination. A movement to choose what we deem best for our babies and ourselves. A movement of educated individuals who don't join together, but who choose alone.

We don't have to talk about it...that's part of the problem, anyway. If other people agree with me, it doesn't mean I'm right--it just means that other people agree with me.

You've heard of the good that the grassroots movements have done for our planet; well, now let's each be our own underground baby movement--this isn't based on groups, it's based on what we SEE to be BEST. It is based on ourselves.

And if our babies receive what we SEE to be the BEST, if we follow our own instincts for our babies...well, I suspect that our choices will ultimately be the best for our planet, too.